There are days I sit, quiz myself as to how some of my best mates are my family. The reason my family are also my friends and why I love them so much has never been more obvious to me than in this 2020 season, and why Today’s Mental Monday is, Family.
Hi and welcome to another installment of Mental Monday, this blog is intended to share my thoughts and experiences hoping my journey will resonate with you and be a blessing. Most importantly this blog is here as a reminder to us all to spread love as we journey in life.
Sitting by the pool after a swim one of my brothers and I were strolling through memory lane when he stumbled upon something I said I would do. He casually laughed as I said I was still planning on doing it because as he retorted, “You’ve been doing that for a while now.”
In that moment something hit me and I was overwhelmed with gratitude as I realised the beauty of family. I must note this realisation might not have occurred if my girlfriend had not told me about the workshop she had been attending on Mental health.
One of the people she met has schizophrenia and she lives life normally because she understands herself and her condition. She knows what can trigger her and after years of trial and error she also has mechanisms to help her avoid being triggered and maintain some control over herself.
Whenever I would try to act some type of way growing up, my family was right there to remind me exactly who I was and most times it was embarrassing. I hated that I couldn’t indulge in the dangerous game of pretence. They would remind me of all my good traits too and so the balance looking back at life seems pretty fair.
Maybe you dont have family, that’s fine but if you do have people who speak to you honestly and openly I would advise you to treasure their voice in your life, even if you don’t like how they speak to you.
Like the schizophrenic lady, my family have helped me realise so much about myself because I was forced to face my reality head on. That has taught me who I am, forced me to own that truth and instead of hide it under my pillow I’ve had to carry it around as my most powerful weapon.
At times we are too busy with the world and its pressure we can’t see the other aspects of ourself and only the voices of others can effectively show us who we are.
Everyone can see you, but you.
– Anonymous
We don’t like knowing that we have bad or we are “defective” but truth is, we all have our own defects and like every problem the first step to solving that problem is recognising there is one.
This year I hope the people we call family are close to us because how they see us and how honest they can be about how they see us will be instrumental in our growth. There is a bible scripture that says,
The truth shall set you free
– The Bible
The truth about you and who you are will set you free and set you up for success, honour your truth.
Here are a few things we can do for ourselves this 2020 to help us enjoy the privilege of family;
1. Listen to the criticism without attaching emotion. When you sit alone analyse whether there is any truth to what was said about you and if there is then find a way to do better if you can or avoid it completely.
2. Listen to yourself. Even with all the advice that will come your way know what works for you. Don’t be too quick to take all the advice before consulting the expert in your life, you!
3. Accept that people will be people and talk. You can’t control how others speak about you but believe they have their own problems and will only talk about you because it’s easier to gossip than solve their own pressures.
Find family that love you enough to be honest with you and still be by your imperfect side. This Mental Monday we acknowledge that we are amazing beings who need family because the ones who love us despite our faults are worth keeping around our amazing selves.
May our lives and experiences be a light for all whom we encounter, we are faulty yes, but we are amazing!
