Ridiculous title I know, but stick with me here, why do you talk? Better yet, what does talking actually mean? What do we mean when we say, if you ever want to talk, I’m always available. What does it all mean?
Hi and welcome to my blog, this week has been freeing creatively and while writing this weeks Mental Monday something strange hit. What does it mean when reaching out and we say, “I’m here if you need to talk” there is a confusion caused by anxiety in this phrase, I would love to explore with you. But as always I hope more than anything else for you that you find love and that you equally help share it.
Why does it have to mean anything really and why can’t talking simply meaning talking? I understand to some extent we aren’t exactly comfortable talking about the real things in life. We dont want our backstory being all part of the news. I equally get that society has coaxed us into believing “okay” and “good” as justifiable responses.
So we are always “okay” and “good” even when we are breaking seven different ways and have no clue how to not break. Tired of breaking we have actually become used to the break and worst still, the silence that accompanies it disguised as strength. And I get it, life has been vicious it’s not easy, but it’s worth it.
When I say I’m available to listen, I literally mean we can talk about anything that’s weighing you down. Sometimes we just need someone who will listen to us for a solution to be found. For hope to grow anew or even for a friendship to be forged.
My problem I’ve been told is that I sometimes forget to just listen. I’m always trying to help solve something and somethings can’t be solved so I should just listen and acknowledge. So now instead I don’t look for solutions in everything. I do however try to make recommendations in everything else.
I found out that if there isn’t an easy solution, then its because as a person I’m focusing on the wrong things. If the obstacle seems too daunting and I’m tired of falling in defeat. Then I have to stop attacking the obstacle and look at myself and my life. Because if the obstacle is too big then instead of kicking and screaming at the obstacle.
I should move away or around the obstacle. I would never have understood this concept if I had no one to talk. The power of interaction is such that if you find others like you, who like what you like and live for what you live for then you will only get stronger at being yourself. Because iron sharpens iron, that’s why.
Now I do understand just starting to talk with people we’ve known our whole lives can be scary what more a complete stranger? Well talking doesn’t have to be intense and scary, talking is one step at a time. If it’s a stranger simply starting with your name and admitting we need help is a step in the right direction.
So many people looking down on getting help from strangers, but what’s the difference with that and simply asking for directions? Both involved a stranger, both had questions and both involved you getting from where you are to where you want to be.
So start with your name, let it flow naturally, you’ll want to run away, you’ll want to scream and that’s fine. However, if you find someone who makes you feel like you could trust them then I would suggest sticking it out and trying to build a relationship to progress from just saying your name.
All you need in this life is to build the experience of learning to trust one person and what all those emotions feel like and how to trust your gut you’ll be able to trust yourself more. You’ll be able to confidently be you more and love life. Talking may seem small but it has a snow ball effect.
If you ever feel like talking, I’m definitely available and interested in helping you realise you are not alone. Take care of yourselves and spread love everywhere you go, until next time be blessed❤
